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So you know those showers you take where you just stand under the hot water for 5-10 minutes? After you\u2019ve done your business, you just stand there, soaking in all the hot water and steam, and just let random thoughts pop into your mind? Well I had one of those showers the other day and one of those thoughts was about self-confidence. I\u2019ve been writing about my journey to become a confident woman. During my shower I realized how convoluted just saying I want to have self-confidence can really be. What does having self confidence actually mean to me? What will make me a confident person? What do I have to work toward to become confident? Will I ever become 100% confident? I put some thought into this and here is what I came up with.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Firstly, I will never reach a point where I will be able to say, \u2018alright, I\u2019m confident now, my job is done\u2019. When I was younger it was easy to say, okay, once I lose this much weight I\u2019m going to be happy and confident\u2019. However, when I lost that weight, there was something else I saw that needed to change. And if\/when I changed that, there was something else. It\u2019s a never ending cycle. I won\u2019t sit here and say that I don\u2019t want to lose weight, because I do. But I know that\u2019s not the end all, be all. I\u2019ve come to terms with the fact that I will always have some sort of body insecurity. And that is okay. That is human. Self-confidence is being happy about your growth.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
Now with those insecurities, comes a lot of self hate. \u2018I hate this part of my body\u2019 \u2018I hate that part of my body\u2019 \u2018I\u2019m too fat\u2019 \u2018I\u2019m too muscular\u2019 etc. I catch myself doing this way too much. I don\u2019t even just say it inwardly to myself, I make other people listen to my self deprecation. Does anyone else say negative things about themselves to your friends\/family\/significant other knowing damn well they will disagree and in turn, compliment you? <\/p>\n\n\n\n<\/figure>\n\n\n\n
You might not even realize you do it. I didn\u2019t at first. However after long hard looks in the mirror, I realize that I vocalize my insecurities to others in hopes of receiving feelings of contentment with myself. Now, that is my toxic trait. It\u2019ll take some work to get there, but Self-confidence is being able to see the beauty in myself with out seeking validation from others. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
In order to stop seeking that validation from others, I need to validate myself. Why is it so easy to compliment others but so much harder to compliment yourself. I for sure have those days where I can look in the mirror and say, \u2018damn, I look good\u2019. But for some reason they\u2019ve been few and far between. We can be so hard on ourselves when we should be loving ourselves. Self-Confidence is being kind to yourself.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<\/figure>\n\n\n\n
However, seeing beauty in yourself is hard when you care so much about what other people think. Will other people notice my foopah in these jeans? Will people think I look fat in this crop top, or see my muffin top in this outfit? One Of my goals is to not give a shit what other people think of me or my body. My body has nothing to do with them. I want to be able to dress however I want to without caring if someone can see a self-proclaimed flaw of mine. Self-confidence is not letting others cause you to second guess yourself.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<\/figure>\n\n\n\n
Now, I know that I\u2019ve only talked about being confident with outward appearances, but I want to make it clear that being proud of your outward appearance is not the only thing that makes up a confident person. To me, self-confidence is also having trust in your own ability to be a good friend\/family member\/significant other, and your ability to see your value in yourself, your work, relationships, future and overall life.<\/strong> Ive definitely faltered more than I few times in these aspects, but who hasn\u2019t. Again, confidence is a work in progress. It may come and it may go at various times. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Self-confidence will always be something I strive for. And self-confidence is being okay if I haven\u2019t made it there yet.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cListen to me, your body is not a temple. Temples can be destroyed and desecrated. Your body is a forest\u2014thick canopies of maple trees and sweet scented wildflowers sprouting in the underwood. You will grow back, over and over, no matter how badly you are devastated.\u201d -Beau Taplin<\/h4>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
So you know those showers you take where you just stand under the hot water for 5-10 minutes? After you\u2019ve done your business,…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":135,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","WB4WB4WP_MODE":"","WB4WP_PAGE_SCRIPTS":"","WB4WP_PAGE_STYLES":"","WB4WP_PAGE_FONTS":"","WB4WP_PAGE_HEADER":"","WB4WP_PAGE_FOOTER":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[11,25,1],"tags":[2,29,3],"class_list":["post-129","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-body-image","category-body-positivity","category-uncategorized","tag-self-confidence","tag-self-esteeem","tag-self-love"],"yoast_head":"\n
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